6 a.m

Guns are to bang
Swords are to clang
Ropes are to hang
Men are to die...

Fool Me Nice...

The song plays,
my mind waves sail towards your shores.
My request is in a bottle,
summarized in a conditional type 1 phrase;
If you don't love me, lie to me.

Saving Private O2

Well, there are just some days that stick in your mind with an eternal glue for ever! Last week I went to a military fort to regulate my admission in the city I currently live in. I was ready, cell by cell, to meet anyone & do my best to persuade them to accept me. So I marched through different sections in the unnecessarily enormous fort, room by room, taking tests & collecting all sorts of signatures. Proud of what I had achieved, I took my inch by inch signed recommendation paper to the person, in charge of sending it to the main base. Neatly shaved & dressed pretty manly in black formal pants & coat, I eneterd the room only to find a soldier inside. He stood up, we shook hands & he told me his boss would be back in a matter of minutes. So I sit there, open my magazine ostensibly to wade through it but really to give my presence an intellectual face! & then he enters, a plump man of about 1.65 m, with thin grayish hair & unshaved beard. I stood up politely & started to explain my case n' stuff & he passes me, gets to his desk, leaves his bag there & returns to the door & closes it.

Why did he do that for?? Disturbing noise perhaps, I convince myself & continue firing my words like a machine gun as he turns to face me. Even I, myself felt my words sounding like Blah Blah Blah at some point but decided to keep it up, nevertheless. I paused for a fraction of a second to glare at the soldier tapping on his desk in a disturbing rhythm & lifted my head back to face the I-Should-Buy-Him-A-Gillete guy. As I was speaking continously, he reaches for his belt & opens it & then unbuttons his pants. I am still speaking, with some shadows of question marks, font 10, appearing above my head! Well, he should be trying to fix things, a voice whispers in my head. Makes good sense to me! So I keep on speaking, then he zips down & opens his pants. Now I can definitely feel that the question marks have grown to a heavy font 40 & some exclamation marks are dancing in Tribal African style around them! but my voice covers for the inner incapaility to cope with the situation! A frail voice tries to convince me that this is just for tidying up his shirt while my brain applauds the thought & honors the voice with the Medal Of Self Deciet. But that didn even last a milisecond, as mr. Had-Me-In-A-Trap pulled down his pants without hesitation, breaking my last defensive line! As I witnessed his white, knee-long underwear, my voice gave in deliberately without asking for my permission! It was at that very instant that my brain started mumbling things about no one has turned gay with losing his virginity in the wrong way, so this is how military goes, I should offer him a rubber for my own safety & hell loads more, I was not even listening to. Then mr. Too-old-for-sexual-activity gently turned towards the hanger on his right & hung his pants. I could hear my brain singing "It's the final count down"! 10, 9, 8, 7, 6... & then he turned towards the hanger again only to pick his military green pants this time & cover things up... PHEWWW, SAFE AT LAST!! My brain momentarily started it's engine & my vocal cords began vibrating as if electricity had just returned to the factory! But before they warm up I noticed my feet had left the room trying to pull the rest of me out!!! Just as if they were starring in Saving Private Ass HOLE! Ass-saving completed! LITERALLY!

As my brain was showing signs of relief, it was to take another hit!
I had to meet mr. knee-long-underwears' boss next. I waited in the hall for about 5 mins till he got back & then asked for permission to enter. He gently invited me in. As I stepped inside, he closed the door behind me & said; just because you are a boy! & as I was speaking, he did the whole process in front of me as well!! (he had gray cowboy underwear-pants though!) "WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE" was flashing in my eyes! but the difference was that this time my brain was strangely in tact & singing "I, am too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt..."!! Thanks god I had left my brains amplifier at home or else it would have caused me serious problems!! Anyways after the short preview of how things go in the military, I decided to get the hell out through the door I had come in, before someone closed it. Virginity in tact is sometimes worth much more than one can imagine!

Well it wasn't an entheralling experience but I sure hope I don't look as good-looking as girls think I am, in guys' eyes!!

Global Cooling

Let the CO2 emissions rise!
Burn more forests & fossil fuel!
For I can feel a chill right to my bones.
My blankets are no longer able to keep me warm.

Melancholy

There is a hole in my sole I run to, often
Booby trapped inch by inch for the unexpected visitors.
Even an anti-god-vision system's installed, to ensure total privacy.
For there are moments where the monkey needs to
think, regret & shed more than just a few tears.
Solitude, silence & total detachment...

Terminology

Wisdom, Kingdom, Condom...

Constipated

Yeah, holy politicians they call themselves!
Hey ,they might be categorised as holy alright,
but that'll be the holy sh*t subtype of course.

Brain Erection

Who says men have two brains!?

Conundrum

I used to be this shy & reserved guy who
didn't get much attention from the girls.
But then again everyone liked & respected the shy me,
while I hated myself.

Now I am self-confident & somewhat cocky.
I do get a lot of attention from the girls.
But not many like the self-confident me
while I am extremely satisfied with myself!

Promiscuous Life

I am gonna let you in on a secret.
After his endless efforts,
'Life' has finally managed to make me pregnant as well!
---
How come 'Life' never stands trial for
his continuous raping cases?

Steps-ville feat. Elevator-man

Hey dude how many times do I have to explain this?
I am not an American Indian &
my name is definitely not Your-Step-Towards-Success!
'SO BACK OFF & FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO CLIMB!!'

A Superfluous Confession

Ok, as hard as it is, I have decided to come clean & admit it!
Us men are puny in comparison to the opposite sex.
I mean hey, I have never even shown an aptitude for this skill!
How can all women, in groups, talk & listen to all, simultanously?
Hmmm... GOD! even my medical knowledge fails me!
I guess I need a break!

Signed by an Ex-male-chauvinist

The Big Bang Theory

- Can I invite you to dinner tomorrow?
- (a nod & a blush)

2+2=4.0000...0001

Would you rather await the bullies in your own front yard
or pay a fortune to invite them all to the notorious-neighbor's yard
down the block for dealing with the lethal affairs elsewhere?
well, alright dear! You can still hold on to your Peace-&-Liberty placard!

Victor was a loser

Have you ever been in a situation where,
a simple 'You are right' or 'I was wrong',
could lead to a happy ending?
Well, I haven't.
---
These three innocent words tend to backfire most often,
with the other person somewhat gaining more ground
& trying to push forward for an emphatic victory!
---
Advice: Unlike other products, only try the words at home & when totally alone!

Cameras also lie

The last two punches in the monkey's stomach did the trick
He started naming the traitors in the order he could remember;
"Parents, Friends, Teachers, Politicians & the Clerics"
They had all taken part in forming what he was today,
without letting him learn & decide the rights & the wrongs in life.
How did they know what was RIGHT anyway? 'The Right Stuff' Textbook!?
He had never doubted their authority so much, until then.
---
You? huh! You-Who?
Look again in the mirror!
You are them...

A,B,C,D...

You know what?

I am still undecided!

I can't seem to decide which one is more tragic;

9/11, Titanic or the first day of school... hmmm...

Enjoy The Silence

It is easier to forgive,
when you get to understand,
all their bitter actions are aimed
at sexually ensuring human race's survival.
---
(& we are one of them.)

Safe Sex Syndicate

"... this has become a two-horse race, John!
The Persian mule & the American elephant are in the lead!"
"& No sign of the chasing pack!
They are just one corner short of the finish line!
Who do you think will win this prestigious title, Bob?"
"This will be a close one!
Here they come folks!
HANG ON TO YOUR HORSES EVERYONE!
WOW!! A CHANGE OF COURSE PERHAPS!?
Shockingly rapid comes the Vatican amorphe from behind
& yes he's close, he passes them, & now,... JESUS CHRIST!!
He's done it! he has crossed the finish-line "
"Or perhaps Crossed the finish-line! Huh!
can you say this 5 times fast, Bob?
'Crossed the cross, crossed with a cross'!"
'Chuckles' "Thanks John!
He's come out clean, way ahead of the leading duo!
The Now Vaticanian is our surprise winner of the season!!"
"& with an amazing pace & in style as well,
setting a new world record!
UN-F*CKING-BELIEVABLE! "
"The F-WORD John!! Does your mom know!? 'a forced hahaha'
We'll have a special interview right after the commercials..."

'Stupid music tone plays as the commercials kick the air'
"Give anyone species too much rope & they'll f*ck it up folks!
Now our ropes come with a free pack of WHO approved
condoms for you & your child's safety, & tha'ts no 'safe tea'!" 'lame laughters'
"'Safe Sex Syndicate Ropes'
Disclaimer: Pay attention to the SSS hologram upon purchase."
...

The F-word Manual

To insult someone greatly when you are totally pissed off,
use the F-word + you.

Caution: Do not apply the rule in cases where
your intended insult might act as a reward & the reply
might come as WHEN!

A GOD-gernade & a Sanity bullet-proof cloak

This is an empty-handed arm robbery!
Put all the money in your vault in this bag.
Anybody moves & I curse you all to go to hell.

Your mamma's got you a 54-color-pencil pack?

I will have to buy me a guide-dog, black shades
& a white convertible cane to match my color-blind cover.
Then with the cane I can Morse an SOS to
the unknown endoteressial creatures to get rid of
the ever-color-changing monsters on this planet.
---
Look buddy;
I like the black,
Don't mind the white,
In fact I don't resent the unicolor at all.
Yet tolerating the Zebras of rainbow stripes,
proves to be out of my powers dude.
Now will that make me a racist to some extent or what?

Nasdaq, Wallstreet & the unknown Cheeseburger

Personality is the only double-priced product in the market.
A tag of your own estimation
& a tag of others judgement.

Well you can always choose to sell yourself
but the reason I never enter the market is due
to the threat of being sold unwillingly & undervalued.

1984+22

War is peace.

The Most Notorious Earthly Criminals: Worlds - L

"Tell me comrade; who's killed more through history?
WW II? Atomic Bomb in Hiroshima? Wallstreet perhaps with it's rolling numbers?", the war hero shed a tear on T.V.

The bored monkey left secretly towards the basement. It was time to kill the next member of the biggest murder-gang in the history of civilization. He took his eraser & tortured 'C' to death, just the way he had previously eliminated 'A' & 'B'. The world was now 3/26th safer.

In search for 'The Three'

I had been told 'The one' was out there
But recently I have come to suspect;
She has either been kidnapped by Al Qaeda,
Frozen to death due to the long wait outside,
Eaten by the hungry wolf not able to eat the three little piglets
or while waiting outside, she met 'The Two'.

Ah I always hated math, that's why I studied medicine.

CellFishLess Alexithymic

I am a quality self confident guy
who is sometimes branded cocky & over confident.
Consider myself sociable & an easy friend-maker.
Got me the standard selfishness in life
but when it comes to keeping the girls I like I lose the selfishness.
It is truly silly yet hopeless. If the person is quality
I feel not deserving & somehwat seize the approach
& if she is below par then after a time I lose interest!
I think I am doomed to an eternal celibacy!

God, Virgin Mary & now Dr O2.

PG 18.16 - When the Owls are out hunting

There are 4 night-time activity themes:

1. Positive: Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh yeah
2. Negative: Oh no, Oh no, Oh no
3. Religous: Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god
4. Fake: Dr, Dr, Dr...

Warning: Do not try this at home.

Astrological Discovery

Attention please.
According to our reliable sources,
This blog has completed it's first Revolution around the sun.

Signed at 1/1/0002 S.H.O.P

Tom & Jerry never found love!

All cats & mice are male
or perhaps females with severe hormonal imbalance.

Send me an angel

God must be a corrupted bastard.
For years I have looked towards the sky
awaiting for an angel to take me away.
Then at GMT+2 a metal angel with it's precision guided arrow
takes a 1-day-old girl away. It's a miracle. A fuckin' miracle...

Smooth Criminal

Since the introduction of Gillette,
break-up & divorce rates have trippled!
Gillette; the best a man can get.

Sleep-Inhibiting Beds

There are big things you learn by hearing small sounds.
e.g: A bed upstairs, singing at 2 a.m

Sensory-Moral Hearing Loss

Her: "Doctor I need hearing aid asap!"
Me: "What is wrong ma'am? Since when have you noticed a hearing loss?"
Her: "Since last night!"
Me: "Oh your husband called you and ..."
Her: "NOOOOE!!! I couldn't hear the couple next door clearly at all!"
Not Me!!:
It was at this very point that me, my medical books, the hospital staff & I've heard even God, all suddenly feeling frail, flimsy, incapacitated, enervated, feeble... or perhaps too minimal to react, filed in for hearing aids!! ---
Types Of Hearing Loss footnote:
There are three major types of hearing loss: neural/sensorineural, conductive, or a combination of both. Treatment depends upon the type of hearing loss that is present.

1. Sensorineural: Sensorineural hearing loss is caused by damage/malfunction of the inner ear (cochlea, eighth cranial nerve) or auditory brainstem. This can be divided further into a sensory hearing loss (inner ear) or a neural hearing loss (brainstem).
2. Conductive: Conductive hearing loss is caused by damage/malfunction of the middle or outer ear system (external ear canal, ear drum, or structures in the middle ear space including the malleus, incus and stapes bones).
3. Combination: Mixed hearing loss is caused by both conductive and sensorineural causes.

Delerium, hallucination & whiskey

Tears have blurred my vision
This book has had me fooled.
I am way into delirium.
Daytime sedation & nocturnal agitation haunt me.
I hear words & illusions never leave me.

A guy in his unifrom whispers in my ear;
"Abe was not a fool but fought for a useless cause.
For as long as this planet dances, there will always be a South.
He only managed to change the Entry-words in dictionaries
they printed, while the definitions are still untouched."

"What's your collars color?" someone in the distance shouts.

Another bottle of whiskey perhaps will enlighten me.
I have to get rid of this visual-auditory hallucination
before it's too late...

From Brain Waves to Pubic Tingles

We are both people of note with hearts of gold.
Your heart is in the northern hemisphere & mine in the southern.
When your heart is summer-hot, my heart's among the snowmen
When my heart's sizzling, yours is in hibernation.
Why is it so hard for both of us to live around the equator?

Shortest Long Ambivalence

- Hello
- Hell-O

Lost in Chemistry, Potions & Sildenafil

In the morning;
She is looking at the wrong side, he is looking at the wrong side.
They see nothing.

At noon;
She is looking at the right side, He is looking at the wrong side.
She sees the back of him.

In the evening;
She is looking at the wrong side, he turns towards the right side.
He sees the back of her.

At night;
She turns towards the right side, he is looking at the right side too.
They see nothing but the right stuff in each others eyes.

Next morning;
She is... he is...

Locked-In Syndrome

I fear being locked in.
Not inside my room, nor inside yours with you upon me.
But the fear of being locked inside this body,
Still alive but not being able to talk, walk or even…

How does it feel to be trapped inside your own skin?
---
Medical footnote:
Locked-in syndrome is a rare neurological disorder characterized by complete paralysis of voluntary muscles in all parts of the body (except for those that control vertical eye movement). It may result from traumatic brain injury, vascular diseases, demyelinating diseases, or medication overdose.

Individuals with locked-in syndrome are conscious and have cognitive function, but are unable to speak or move. The disorder leaves the patient completely mute and paralyzed. Communication may be possible only with blinking eye movements.

There is no cure for locked-in syndrome, nor is there a standard course of treatment. Functional neuromuscular stimulation may help activate some paralyzed muscles. Several devices to help communication are available. Other treatment is symptomatic and supportive.

The prognosis for those with locked-in syndrome is poor. The majority of patients do not regain function.

#100 - Sending light signals for the alien

100 ideas lighter,
Feel a century more mature with the people I've come to know.

I haven't learnt how to build a shuttle perhaps,
Yet it's a joyful experience to be launching a blog into space!
---
Twilight is fading through, seems like I'm fading too.
Have you ever bumped into the same insane sense?

Exactly 25 years since the flaw

We are born when fathers' financial miscalculations
lead to lowered preventive measures late one month.
25 years later looking at my image in the mirror
I sign a contract with a promise to myself to cut this vicious cycle.
I'll start my own piggy bank today in order to save humanity!
Save the world, make it a better place for us & the undelivered babies...

History is there to teach us what not to do!
Act now before it's too late.
---
Just a birthday note. Nothing serious ;-)

Hips don't lie but words?

Love is a euphemism for Libido the mute lad shouted.
Liking is the stronger & more honest path to glory.
Then the nice priest gave him a Mona Lisa smile
took the last three letters in the new defined love
and announced them husband and wife.

Safe home tonight (part 1)

I am exhausted honey.
Have just spent a great deal of energy
pushing the button to launch the Cruise.
I am not suffering from PTSD though
It was just another ordinary day
A safer day for humanity
Less O2-H2O consumers my dear
A better day for Rex, Tommy & all other pets.

Play me the piano or the violin ma cherie.
Hand me a pack of Marlboro Lights in the bedroom & a can of refreshing Coke s'il te plait.
No Pepsi but Coke
Not due to it’s fame although it clears my burning tears
Nor due to disappointing Beyonce or Jennie
But for the fact that it’s can is red
Red like diamonds, red like oil or perhaps as red as gold, Red like…
I am not suffering from PTSD though, no I am not.
It was just another ordinary day...

The one with Elixir bottle

Noah lived long
People's jealousy lives longer

Formally Serving Bananas

The monkey finished reading the Planet of the Apes script
Glanced through the Darwinian evolution image in front of him
And lifted his head to watch the people making the headlines on CNN
He took his pen and completed the cycle by drawing the reverse path
Then staring at his achievement he mumbled;
"Hallelujah we are back in command!"

No (U-2 + 2nd vowel + Y's left neighbor) Alert

My fellow XX
Send your children to bed early.
Only two nights left to the 4 week XY international shut down!

Don't Be Shy Honey, Shake Hands...

The preplexed monkey surfed through his brain;
Politics with its complexities even at it’s highest levels resembles childhood games. Actions tend to differ due to unreasonable logic. The perfect instance is the famous/notorious Iranian-American relationship. Two countries of major importance for their political & geographical status are in long-term dispute while it is obvious to both parties that developing a direct connection and by-passing the third party countries, is to their benefit if not the only solution left. But there exist some obstacles.

Ever since the monarchy of America-dependent Shah was overthrown in Iran in 1979 & the American embassy hostage taking saga occurred, both countries have been throwing a vast variety of accusations at each other just like two kindergarteners swearing and cursing each other after an argument. But this little argument has not stopped for 27 years now & strangely enough has an augmented idiopathic intensity comparing to the original nucleus. However in this world of ours that every second counts, it takes a fool not to recognise that the core problem has long been forgotten and both countries have since then evolved. Therefore it is crystal clear that new measures are to be taken accordingly.

When Americans imposed sanctions on Iran & then fueled Iraqi tanks for an invasion to the country, they had high hopes which never blossomed. The force was to break the resistance but they didn’t know that their counterparts were as stubborn as they were. Iran went under 8 years of destructive war but was still determined not to talk to the child down the block. Instead Iran, with its huge Oil reserves and second largest natural gas reserves, turned towards Europeans & this new player eagerly decided to play along & took advantage of the situation. America lost a big energy supply, the strategically important region & a possible ally, while Iran lost a powerful ally and went under economical damage due to purchasing the essentials from third parties for an over-extra price.

Now both countries see the need to establish a link but their massive challenge remains to be facing their own nations & convincing them that the monster they’ve created over the last 27 years was fake or better yet, is now tamed. Like children who have lied to their parents about this super nasty kid in their school but now want to make friends again. The ironic part is that they still publicly denounce each other with Axis-Of-Evil replacing Iran’s name in memories in McDonald land and cries of “down with U.S.A” being heard every Friday in the land of the newest Yellow-cake-club member.

There is a skeptical theme to the relation at the presence due to the fact that they have both diverted their fondness towards each other in the form of anger since they are both too shy to step forward and yet expect the other to show a sign first. The strong sense of pride in both countries is among other factors exacerbating the condition. It can also be related to a mental defensive mechanism of ours called “Projection” where an individual blames others for his own fault and makes himself to believe it’s real.

Can the men in Limousines find the secret connection-code? Can they rescue the situation and establish a link? Or will anger, temper & the child in them get the better of the situation? We’ll have to wait and see on the next exciting episode of Want-to-be-F.R.I.E.N.D.S. (With no Jennifer Anniston)

The monkey amazed by the number of words he had vomitted, feeling 30 kg or so lighter, regurgitated what was left in his mind and went to his bedroom to watch Garfield dance.

Dial 4-5683-968

Obviously she has found out I am cheating on her.
I've been sleeping with her two best pillows
at the same time while she was away.
Now she wants to break up for the sake
of the children we were to breed & raise together!

Irrelevant Relevancy

Most frequent words on the news these days:
Elections
Fraud
George Bush
Ahmadinejad
Gay marriage
Family problems
Nuclear energy
Terrorism

My Probable Next Step?

I cracked a smile, you tore my smile away.
I drizzled you with complaints, you showered me with blame.
I am fed up with what you’ve fed me down.
I feel sick in my stomach but I fear,
If I blow it up on your ragged dress, you storm out my existence!

Remix...

SOS please
Someone help me
She's just passed thelarche & she is showing off her BEEP*

Warm Beers & Tears

You are XX and I am XY.
Your chatterbox 'X's are blind
My mascular 'X' & 'Y' are deaf & mute.
You are still looking as I am talking.

From: Talks-with-actions of the XY tribe
To: Cares-for-words of the XX tribe

Measurement Renaissance

Length of life they ask?

Yesterday's Philosophy: "Not life’s length that matters but the width."
Today's Phalusophy: " Well it depends on your vision of 6 inches ± 1. "
...

Wisdom Betrayed Me

I was told to be wise & avoid politics.
Now the stupid decide my rights and actions.

Where Angels Fail To Fly...

When the world is painted black,
when we feel so low & devastated & we can't pick on the people responsible
there is always mother to be bullied! For she's always in reach & never takes revenge.
---
"Maybe only one day to her name is rediculous but it's a symbol of our knowledge"
---
"According to prehistoric books the first mother's name is said to have been Tolerant Tolerance"
---
"I've heard angels are nothing but women who fear motherhood"

...MOM! WHY IS THIS FOOD...

Who's On The Throne?

Yes religionless I am. I don't even bother to think if your prophets did truely exist the way you describe them & to be honest their so called miracles are not half as interesting as Harry Potter's!

Actually I don't even have the time to think which of your gods is better, mightier, smarter... Or which of your prophets was the true messenger, the more handsome...

Muslim, Christian, Hendu or Jew maybe you lost your gods somewhere behind your prophets. It is not about god & prophets anymore but the hidden ambitions. Your gods have price tags worth your prides while reality is the burried victim. Even with GPS it is difficult to understand many paths toward the same destination exist.

Religionless I am yet I do worship me, viruses, leaves, musicians & the many gods I have come to notice.

Oh I lost my doG in their mirrors...

The One About To Be Zapped By Zeus

Civil Burrial Of Civilisation...

Some years later in a dusty book held by an unearthly figure:

...and we suddenly woke up to see the device which had taken us centuries to build to guide us all through peacefully, had led us to a major confrontation. Mesmerized by our own creation we decided to ignore the flaw & keep using the pathfinder towards the inevitable promised land of extinction…

Decoded by Anthropologists from:
Page X, Paragraph Y of The Unwritten Book

A Toy Plane Without Fuel...

As a child I knew my brain worked much better than most adults.
I had a clear vision & deep inside I felt as a wise adult.
I was just inches shorter, didn't know how to make money or make love.

I knew time was the lost element & as the clock marched on,
I was getting closer to adulthood.

Now I am tall enough, have graduated & make enough money
I make love, I worry about numerous adulthood issues.
Yet I no longer have the clear vision & deep inside
I feel as a stupid child.

Short Life...

What is the story behind our short lives?

1. Too many people; not enough material
2. Global warming; medical heat stroke preventions
3. The importance of low weight; less pressure on feet
4. The communication era; no comment
5. Others

Sad Wings Of Fortune...

Life is full of different one way streets which lead to the same destination. There are various signs on the way. You try to navigate your way towards the target you've set off for but after a long drive through the impossible, when support is more than essential from the watching crowd, instead of all the cheers & jeers, you see them holding up the "Time To Die" sign.

& in the last painful, cold & lethal seconds, as your memories flash by with a regretful theme, you come to wonder if they would face a different fortune driving the same car you had inherited from the last contestant.




---

I am not so sure anymore if it is the old age that kills people due to exhaustion. It is perhaps the young age killing the exhausted due to negligence & ignorance.

Battery Low...

"Necessity" might be the mother of inventions, but "Laziness" is surely the grandma.

---

Hail The Great Laziness For It Is The Sole Motivation Towards Progression.
It acts just as the rope-tied-carrot held in front of our long-eared images, driving us forward towards a life filled with more laziness or the polite equivalent; Comfort!

---

Laziness is the pioneer in each & every aspect of this planet. The first basic molecule in each & every object. The opening sound in the sentences we say or the alphabet we use to spell out our ideas...

---

"Was it not for laziness, we'ld be still living in caves..."

The Ring Sections Beneath...

Age is not calculated by the number of candles on ones birthday cake but the thickness of ones skin.

Maybe not even experience but the maturity of responses to the environmental triggers.

Or perhaps it is not measured by the number of friends one makes but the number of friends he keeps.

---

In case of different answers by the different methods, go with the average.

---

It is possible not to age & stay young according to the new formulas. This might as well win me a noble prize...

The Swan Is Singing...

Imagine trying to build concrete blocks in a line in the hope of building a stronghold upon them. Then in an instant you feel you are one of the blocks in the line yourself. Then suddenly the camera changes into a tower view & you see the blocks have taken domino shapes & before you notice what’s wrong or what should be done, an invisible force pushes the first piece.

Me & my hopes of fixing things up have already fallen. I tried my best not to trigger the next fall. Should turn on CNN to check the amount of damage on this sinking ship…

Natural Selection, Is It?

A brave strong face the XY put on. Posing a tough stature on the stage they show off the muscles they've built up during their hard daily routines. Yeah, yeah so much for the strong masculine guys! Then tell me how is it that the strong men live shorter lives than the so called weaker women!?

A Frog In My Throat...

A naïve gigantic rooster of only black & white I might be,
squawking around the farm. But it still hurts when they use
the friendship knife to cut your head off doesn’t it?

However small the size of this heart might be, it still can crack deep.

I guess I still can shed a tear or two behind the mask of silence I wear around. Storm can still flow through my every cell.

How simplistic of me to trick myself into believing it was still day
with the many candles I lit around me when it was deep dark outside.

A look at the wrist watch tells me time will wash off the pain. I'll treasure the scar…

---

Men probably marry after friends kill themselves in their eyes...

O-Scars...

Sometimes events forget the reason they are taking place. Sometimes prizes go to the wrong people. Yet when we are talking about Oscars we are not talking about a small scale on which movies are judged & mistakes are common. Or in better words we were not talking about it that way at least!

All n' all, with all the familiar glamourous faces & the same if not better preparations, Oscar was only a fading shadow of what it used to be this year. The prizes went to the worst options ever & they just went to the safe-to-be winners instead of the must-be winners!

Oscar "Crash"ed it's own reputation with the stupidity running through the elections including aspects in their judgement which was not to be involved.

Well no argue that this gay-topic has always proved to be provokative to the public but "Brokeback Mountain" was just a movie when it arrived at the Oscars & it had to be judged accordingly. Guess there are factors other than Cinema involved. Is that what Oscar is all about then?? Why 8 nominations if they did not approve the story? Straight or gay? is this the question they should be asking before voting?

& the error was not only in this field but it continued to emphasize on shocking the audiance instead of rewarding the best...

Oscar-What?

Selling Comparatives & Superlatives

Walking up again towards "Human Life High"
To learn what I am told to be learning;
Who is the strongest
Who is the best
Who holds the aces
The East or the West
This is the crap our children are learning
& then suddenly I feel my eyes burning
Jesus Christ imagine what it must be earning…

Roger & Me

What's Your Sign?

- "Hello ma'am. Can I have the pleasure of a dance?"
- "Not before I know your birthdate & check with a couple of books sir."

Who's Your Daddy Now...

It was me who kissed the Sleeping Beauty awake & then left
just in time to entrap the prince who had no idea how
his life would change with the marriage which would fall upon him…

Even if it was not me, it was someone before me.

How simplistic of my parents to believe
she was cursed for a childish reason
& then woke up to even a more stupid one...

I am off to waking someone else up...

Signed by a 6 year old with the sattelite remote in his hand

2 ¾ Kg Of Hearing Loss Please...

Politician or artist, mullah or priest,
singer or actor & the whole bunch of you
who are also categorized among the businessmen;
I’ve long shut my ear-gates to your time to time thought invasions.

I can never learn anything of value
from you self-righteous monkeys indoctrinating your paths of glory
through your amplified trembling voices with the fake self-confidence
induced by the microphones in your hands.

P.S: I just can’t decide in whose memory I should piss today…
P.S 2: Maybe I just go with the people on the news at 9…

Conclusion: The psycho needs stronger pills. Having delusions again…

Stainless Steel, Made In...

... & when they manufactured our corps somewhere even farther than planet X,
on the left upper quadrant of our left buttocks
below where they've printed our serial numbers,
they stamped in bold; "CHANGE-RESISTANT"

ZZZZZ...ZZZZZ...ZZZZZ...

We live to sleep. We work, we study & we breathe to sleep. Sometimes alone sometimes with people who want to test our beds & then the next day we wake up to sleep once again until the day we forget how we used to wake up…

It seems to me we all retire on a high. Ending our performances with yet another goal achieved while everyone remembers the last time we’ve gone to sleep.

---

Some of us are heavy-sleepers while some others sleep is as light as a feather. To know your type, wigh yourself before going to bed & once again when you are snoring. The weight difference will be the weight of your sleep. Good luck!

---

There are also people in our lives telling us bedtime stories until we pass out, feeling we are best when totally unconscious. If the number of such people devided by the ones who prefer your awake form is bigger than 1 then you'll either miss breakfast or you'll have to eat it alone...

---

Reminder: Don't forget to brush your teeth & visit the W.C before hand...

Ah time to sleep...

Ship Me A Sink...

The Egyptian ship's (Al-Salaam Boccaccio 98) tale is a tragedy of it's own but I still feel more for Jack & Rose! Is it the music, different directors or perhaps the fading colors of reality through decades, I am not yet sure about...

---

Hey god I guess some officials up there need to be studying more English not to mix up "Ship ME A Sink" with "Sink Me A Ship"...

---

Yeah yeah the same story of relationships among the bad-guys & the government. A ship sinks, lives end & yet the guy responsible for the tragedy calmly sips his glass of vodka besdie his fireplace, shedding tears but only for his lost ship...

Stupidity X (Pen + Paper) > WMD

... & as the viking army out of boredom begun it's invasion on the volatile shores of middle earth, unknowingly they trespassed the borders of tolerance in the land while back home their cows had started laying eggs...

The reason, the cause & the goal to the act were the only unanswered questions...

Run Rabbit, Run...

It is time to write the next phrase in my once blank page now full of a variety of complete & incomplete letters, words, phrases & sentences I have put together to give sense a new birth . So much thought & so much effort once again to try to add another piece on my unrewritable scroll. & then after all I put into each & every part, when at last my sentence is done, it is only time to write another one. Another one. I wonder how much time is left on the examiners watch for me which is not set in an understandable way. Oh by the way what should be the topic to my new paragraph? Love, Hate, War, Freedom Of Speech or The Girl Next Door who is giving me the eye...!?

"Sorry sir, I am not feeling too well. Something like nausea or an eminent diarrhea I suppose. Can I meet John or was it George?" The hell with it for now. Let's concentrate on the hollow space at the begining of each new paragraph & the gap after it is done…

"Hey Bro; What's Your Blood Type?"

Dear brothers & sisters, let me proudly be the first to publicly announce that the humans are in minority to us vampires now. Keep soaking their blood people.

Warning: Do not forget to test your victims for HIV before-hand.

The Bird Flew...

What’s wrong with these news agencies? Have they just come to notice Chicks can kill??

P.S: Guess Adam wouldn have considered this sth nu either!!

---

I don’t really care about the gender of the chicken I ate last night but can they please let us know the local spread of this bird flu thing so we can decide whether to die or keep trying to breathe on???

---

Why is everyone suddenly interested in the bird that flew!!??

------

Bird Flu clinical Features:

The incubation period for H5N1 avian influenza may be longer than that for normal seasonal influenza, which is around 2 to 3 days. Current data for H5N1 infection indicate an incubation period ranging from 2 to 8 days and possibly as long as 17 days. However, the possibility of multiple exposure to the virus makes it difficult to define the incubation period precisely. WHO currently recommends that an incubation period of 7 days be used for field investigations and the monitoring of patient contacts.

Initial symptoms include a high fever, usually with a temperature higher than 38oC, and influenza-like symptoms. Diarrhoea, vomiting, abdominal pain, chest pain, and bleeding from the nose and gums have also been reported as early symptoms in some patients. more

No Beans For You Boy...

Once there was a big small cosmopolitan village full of fools of every color. In the western side of the village lived G, a mighty self-merited above-sheriff who had been a notorious outlaw, legislating his every move through the guy named K who he himself had appointed as the sheriff. G pumped up money through his enormous bean-fields & the neighboring conserve factory he owned. He was against anyone (but the-exceptions) planting beans while he had made them so dependent to it. But apart all these, he had also developed the Bean-Fart-Killing (BFK) technology which he had tested on the ENEMY as he put it in the far eastern part of the village.

In the middle section of the village stood 3 ranches. They sat on goldmines yet not so fond of trading with G. They preferred to do business elsewhere unaware of the change of map G had dreamt for their region. First the house on the right was secured over their clear terrorist activities giving G the chance to build a stronghold in the region. Then came the house on the left belonging to mad-S who was also dealt with on the pretext of hiding the BFK G had sold him. Expectedly the goldmine was looted afterwards as the sheriff silently watched the scene.

But the third house in the middle sitting over the richest goldmine of the 3 had a different story receiving support from G’s foes. It belonged to a guy named M who was a fool like others in the village but spoke out what he’d come to think of. It was not the outflow of gold to the unknown that bothered G nor the hostility between M & A –G’s best friend- but the development of the tiny bean field M’s household was going through which G as the only one who had had the experience FEARED MIGHT lead to the development of BFK.

G had power, G had wealth & also the BFK technology. Firstly he equipped A with BFK. Then G trying to stop M from owning a bean field accused ugly M of trying to develop BFK & turned the village against him. M lost his temper & publicly announced his desire to fart upon A’s household & this led to …

At this point the story-teller feels intoxicated by the poisoned environment over the case trying to see what the outside world feels about the village.

P.S: The characters in the story are fake. Similarities of names & directions are to be ignored.

"Quality" has become dumb...

If quality talks for itself then why are the girls on the other side not noticing me but the teenager smoking his cigar in his dad’s BMW??

Well I don' really blame them. Just looking at that car induces orgasm for ALL in range...

---

I am in love with how QUALITY speaks for itself these days expressed in the clothes one puts on, the perfume they ware & the dream car they drive as a taxi to take the ones they attract, to the you-know-wheres….

"Hey "Quality" buddy, you gone dumb?? Speak to me man. oh my god he ain't breathing! Nurse! Check his pulse! Oh no! we are losing him..."

---

Conclusion: Perhaps Quality has come to know it's rights and won't speak a word till his lawyer arrives.

FAQ: Why???

Reality Transfusion...

I remember life back in those days watching films in the black-&-white TV set at my grandpas while the world was full of boisterous colors. Now TV sets show us the extinct colors of life while life itself is in black & white!

...and then you remind me to take off the sunglasses I am trying on, as if the world would be any brighter if I lay down the shades I ware to deny being colorblind & stare at the not-so-shining sun.

" Oh doctor please help me out! I am beginning to see red rivers among these shades of black & white!"
" Hey son, we sometimes have the vision but it's nothing more than visual hallucinations. My advice for you is TO SHUT UP & DON'T EVEN TALK ABOUT IT."

Help, I've Lost My Feathers...

Birds, feathers & the story of flocking together.

Well our race has got no feathers so perhaps the secret of flocking together is lost somewhere in between the lines. Perhaps for us humans it should be something like "People of the same tongue walk together" Or is it also "Obligations stick us together"?

---

P.S: It is probably much the same for birds as well. It ain't about appearance but the language we speak in.

Ah these “Sayings” of simplicity…

The Sensibility of Nonsense...

... a woman in Africa dies of hunger, the woman in the middle east fights for women's rights and far across the ocean, she is singing of her hump, her hump, her hump, her lovely little lumps! it's a miracle...